The window of my bedroom faces east. Before the sun even rises, the birds in the tree outside begin to declare that the world has made its turn and a new day is about to dawn upon us again. As soon as the first rays peek over the horizon, they find their way right in between the cracks in my window shades. As the warmth fills my room, and the night darkness crawls away, my heart begins to stir before my body in anticipation and fear of what this new day may hold.

 

Every day has been filled with healing. Sometimes this requires pain first and soothing second. Much of the pain seems to occur in those first moments where I am caught somewhere between awake and asleep.

 

In the cave, daily there are voices that seems to echo from people that once spoke into my life. They may have had good intentions before, but as situations changed, so did their vows of loyalty. Now their words bounce around the emptiness as a reminder that they would not be back or ever present again.

 

I’ve found that in a season of healing – whether it be Moses, David… or even me –reflecting on the goodness of God is essential. Just as the cave dwellers of old had to spend time writing down God’s goodness through creation or the Exodus, or write Psalm after Psalm, so I too have to write, recall, and even sing to remember God’s faithfulness. This is always where the soothing begins.

 

Perhaps the hardest daily battle, yet the most important task, is to fight bitterness. When recollecting events, conversations or even relationships of the past that may have seemed to turn for the worst, I have to work let go of any hard feelings that may begin to fester. Here in the cave, the only way to find true dependency on Christ is true humility before His throne; and you can’t go before His throne with humility if you are embittered towards others. It is impossible to be seen as humble in God’s eyes when you have a “they-owe-me” attitude.

 

The brightness of the sun is painful but nice. Though my eyes may long for the darkness of the cave in this season of healing, it only takes about a little time before the sun changes my hesitant heart and fills it will stamina that will carry me through yet another day. Thank you, Lord.